கோடை மழை!

 Author : Suganya Kannan
மழைத்துளி!
நீ சொட்டு சொட்டாய் விண்ணிலிருந்து என் கன்னத்தில் பட்டதும் உன் ஸ்பரிசத்தில் லயித்துப்போய் உன்னில் காதல்கொண்டேன்.
மின்சாரக்கம்பிகளில் உன் துளிகளின் வடிவம் ஒன்றை ஒன்று மோதி கீழே விழுகையில் புல்வெளியெல்லாம் உயிருற்றது.
பேருந்துகளின் சன்னல் கம்பிகளில் நீ பட்டு பட்டு படர்வதைக் கண்டு,
சின்ன சின்ன குழந்தைகள் உன்னோடு சேர்ந்து ஆடும் ஆட்டத்தைக் கண்டு,
வாடிப்போன செடி ஒன்று மெல்ல துளிர் விடுவதைக் கண்டு,
பயிர்களை கண்டு வாடிய விவசாயின் புன்முறுவலைக் கண்டு,
ரோட்டோரக் கடைக்காரன் குடைக்குள் ஒதுங்குவதைக் கண்டு,
சாலையோரத்தில் ஏழை, பணக்காரன் என்று பாராமல் மக்கள் ஒருமிதத்து நிற்பதைக் கண்டு,
இடிகளின் ஓசையில் சின்னஞ் சிறுகுழந்தை அன்னையின் சேலைக்குள் ஒளிவது கண்டு,
ஒரு வினாடியில் நீ செய்யும் அத்தனை அற்புதங்களையும் கண்டு மெய்சிலிர்க்க வியந்து போனேன் இயற்கையின் எழிலில் திகைத்தவளாய்!
ஆனால், இத்தனையும் இருந்தும்
மழைக்காலத்தில் வரும் பெருமழையை விட இந்த கோடைக்கால மழை மீது தான் எனக்கோ ஏன் இந்த காதல்?

Break Up! – (Not in Love but in Friendship)

Author : Suganya Kannan

It was a fine morning in the Spring season…

sunrise
The Sunrise and the Morning Dew

The mountains were covered with mists and the terrace of every home in that village was as chill as ice cubes. Birds woke up and started to sing their Hymn. (Crows craw… craw…, Cuckoos cuckoo.. cuckoo..) The trees were so green and leaves were left with some water droplets as there was a rain the previous day. The roads were spotless and the streets were serene except the sounds of birds and animals. No human was found in the street as it was so chill.

On a corner of the main street, there was a tea shop opened. As per Indian regulations, men only seem to be sitting in the tea shop either to taste the tea or to read the newspapers. So, there was no woman there. Some people who were ready to go for work, were waiting for the bus in the bus stop. Sita came to normal from her travelling dreamy mood to the real world. Yes! It was my stop! she told the conductor. Sita was a girl aged 25 working in a Public sector for two years. She was not so fair not so dark (A medium Indian color girl) with her white Churidhar consisted of golden borders. Her hair was pitch black color which was exactly contrast to the color of her churidhar. It was tied with a single dark green color Clip. With a spot-sized black bindi upon which a pinch size kum-kum laid on her forehead, she looked gorgeous. Her eyebrows were broad and thick as it was no need to draw any eyebrow pencils. Her eyes which were rotating 360 degree to search, it could even tell a poem. She added extra beauty to her eyes with a thin eyeliner which can make her confidence level to stay strong in the society as it can make her eyes sharper than before, which could help her to avoid herself from some bad people, because with those beautiful and sharp eyes, she looked like a woman who can fire them without any other weapon. For your kind information, this is the reason why most of the independent girls choose eye liner when they go to any public places. In the hand, two to three silver bangles and a Fastrack watch were placed, her long and beautiful nails were polished with a mild orange color nail polish. She took her cream colored bag and a trolley which was dark grey in color and stepped out from the bus within a minute. When her feet (not her feet exactly, only her sandals) touched the road, She felt something which insisted her that it was a place which was so familiar to her or it was the village where she supposed to live. With that affirmative thought, she took her luggage and went to the tea shop. The climate was so chill and she was in need of something warm to make herself and her metabolism to be active. She preferred tea and it just went inside her taste buds within a minute. But the taste and the wetness of the tea reminded in her tongue and lips for at least half an hour in her mouth. She felt little bit active then to take her luggage faster. While entering into the street, she could see long coconut trees and some shrubs and plants in front of every home in the village. Some birds were singing and some cats and dogs were roaming in the street. From every home, ladies came out with some water in the bucket and cleaned their front porch of the house. Some of the ladies were busy with their kolam designs to complete as quick as possible. Sita took her mobile phone to capture these admirable things happening there. As her mobile phone had 20 MP camera, it captured the picture vibrant and brighter.

street setup
A street in the village – Morning Scenario

A lady aged approximately 50 watched Sita like she had never seen her before. Who are you? Is there any relatives of you staying in this village? For what purpose have you come here?” She added many questions. Sita quietly started replying one by one. “Maa… I am Sita working as a government employee in the nearby town. I have no relatives in this village yet. I came to stay here for some days regarding my work”, she said. Her answer was half right and half wrong. Yes! She was a government employee, who came to the village to stay for some days not regarding her job, but to attend a marriage. She didn’t say anything regarding that to the lady because she didn’t want to explain her issues to a stranger.

Sita took her baggage and continued her walk. While walking, some memories of her best friend came into her mind. Tears started rolling down from her eyes without even asking permission from her. She wiped those with the hankie and at last found the home, for which she already paid rent, near Lord Krishna’s Temple.

It was a small house but traditional with some flowerpots and hanging baskets. While entering into the hall, she could hear the chirping sound of Sparrows from one corner of the house. There was a nest upon a shelf in the wall, where a Sparrow’s family was living. Once Sita switched on the light, the sparrows started to fly from there and reached their nest only in the evening. From that day, Sita wouldn’t switch on the lights of that lobby. She could remember her best friend whenever she saw that nest. It was because once her friend shared that he had experienced the same thing in his house.

Sita unpacked all her things in the trolley and made the house looked like a place where anyone can get the peace and bliss. As we all know, villages always have neighbors with friendly approach when compared to urban areas, Sita too had a neighbor. Her neighbor’s family was a nuclear family which consists four members. A father, a mother and their son & daughter who were children with the age of 10 and 12. “Hi! Is there anyone in the home?” a sound came from the door side. “Yes! I’m here.” Sita moved to the door and replied. “You are Sita. Right? I am Rupa and I’m your neighbor. Your house owner told me that you are an independent girl working for the government and gonna stay here for some days. If you need any help, you can call me at any time”, told Rupa. Rupa is the same neighbor which I already mentioned. She was a house wife aged 35 approximately. As Sita was new to that village, Rupa used to help Sita in all aspects from that day. They became friends in a short span as Friendship is beyond the boundaries of age.

One fine Saturday evening, they both went for a walk to the Temple nearby. On the way, fortunately, Sita came to see the house of her best friend. She searched for the photo of that house sent by her best friend in her mobile gallery. Yes! It was there. Her brain confirmed that it was the same house. But she reacted like she didn’t know anything about the house and asked Rupa, “Whose house is this? And why it seems decorative? Is there any function gonna happen here?” Rupa stated, This was the house of a joint family living within the same compound but separate houses. Next week, there will be a marriage of their son, whose marriage is the last marriage of that generation. So, it seems so decorative. On hearing this, Sita felt utmost happiness. So, she smiled a little without showing her teeth. Rupa asked, “What are you thinking? And why are smiling now without any reason?” Sita told, Nothing!and started her walk. They reached the temple and while returning to home, Rupa’s husband came there and asked his wife to pick up their children from school as he had some other work. Rupa nodded her head and moved from there to the school. Sita bid a Bye sign to Rupa and continued her gait.

While she was near to reach her home, she could able to see a Bike which was familiar to her and she could recognize the number plate too. Then she moved her eyes up and it was her friend. Her happiness couldn’t be explained in words. She felt like she has achieved a long time goal. Her face with full of excitements and confusions, she waved her hand and opened her mouth, “Ram! Ram!” her voice shouted. But there happened an incident, something which she never expected. Ram didn’t even bid a reply instead he nodded his head and moved from there. Sita felt like her soul was taken by God for seconds. Yup! She felt the utmost happiness when she saw him but within seconds she had to face the utmost pain she ever had in her life. She felt like she had died already. While walking on the road, that ignoring moment by Ram came to her eyes many times. She didn’t even respond to anybody in the road and moved like a Robot with no feelings with the same shock which she couldn’t tolerate for hours.

After reaching the home, she went to the bed and wet her pillow as every girl does when they feel any agony. But she also tried to recollect the other things which happened in the road that time. She murmured to herself, “Yes! It is his relative. May be that is the reason!” She consoled herself by thinking that Ram avoided her only because of his relative who was there.

It was Sunday evening… The sun is about to set. The Sparrows reached the nest of her house. Sita came to the terrace of her house and watered some plants placed there. While pouring water, she felt some emptiness in her mind because it was going to be the last night for her in that village. Then, her mind accepted the reality and she went to prepare food for her dinner. She prepared some noodles which could fill her stomach a little but could make her tongue feel the spicy chilly taste for hours. Sita was a very good cook. She could prepare every food tastier and somewhat different from other’s cooking methodologies. Even the noodles tasted like a delicious dinner. With that taste left in her tongue, she moved to the bed and set an alarm for 4 O’ clock. Within minutes, she felt asleep.

Ring, Ring! Ring, Ring!”, the alarm sounded. Sita couldn’t hear it. After 10 minutes, she woke up and her eyes didn’t come back from the drowsiness. She again had a nap for 10 minutes. It was 5 a.m.. Sita with her elegant Pink Lehenga looked like a Princess. She had taken oil bath and her hair was so smooth and silky as it could grab every one’s attention. She didn’t apply any creams or any other cosmetics in her face except the eyeliner and a dot sized black Bindi. She tied her hair with a black hair clip and fitted her feet into a pair of golden-colored sandals. She was simple but elegant with her attire. “Sita! Where are you?”, Rupa sounded. I’m here and I have to go to a marriage today”, Sita replied. On hearing this, Rupa got surprised and told that she is also getting ready for a marriage and she added, “It was the marriage of that Joint family’s son which I already told you.” Sita smiled a little and bid a bye to Rupa.

It was 7.00 a.m. Sita was entering the marriage hall. It was the same marriage which was told by Rupa. The banner was with the words “Ram weds Meera”.  Sita felt a pleasant joy, no excitements, no griefs, but with peace and complete happiness. When entered the hall, everyone saw her with a suspect look, because Sita was not invited by anyone there. Bride’s family thought that she was groom’s relation. In the similar way, Bride groom’s family thought that she was bride’s relation or friend. Sita entered near the stage. She could see Ram’s mother and father. They were very happy because it was their son’s marriage. On seeing their faces, Sita felt like she has achieved something she wanted to happen for years. Within minutes, the bride and the groom were called by the typical Tamil Prohidhar (In foreign culture, there won’t be Prohidhars but instead you may have fathers in the church) as it was the time to tie the knot. The bride was really elegant with her maroon colored silk saree and with all the jewels and accessories, she looked beautiful. The bride groom was with white silk shirt and dhoti. He was so handsome with this attire. Ram and Meera came to the stage and they started delivering the Mantras told by Prohidhar. The camera man started shooting photos and videos. As Ram was fond of photography, he wanted his marriage photos to be candid with good frame. So, he decided to prepare for that and asked Meera to give pose accordingly. While seeing the people who came to the marriage, Ram’s eyes found Sita. He felt surprised and confused on seeing her. But Sita didn’t even respond. She just sat in the chair placed in the front row with a smiling face. Within minutes, Ram had many confusions because he didn’t even invited her for his marriage. He thought that she might be Meera’s friend too but he didn’t ask her because he had some hesitation to ask about Sita.

Within minutes, the marriage was over. Everyone in the marriage felt happy and Sita blessed them whole heartedly. Once the marriage was over, every friends and relatives moved to the stage and blessed the wedding couples with gifts and accessories. After sometime, Sita entered the stage with a Jewel box in her hand. Congratulations! Happy Married Life, Ram! You both look amazing and made for each other. Meera! You are such a blessed one to have Ram. I’m his Best friend Sita”, Sita wished them from her heart and also introduced herself to Meera. She opened the jewel box which had couples Diamond Rings. She asked Ram to make it wear to Meera’s finger and Meera to do the same to Ram. And she took a photo shoot with the couples and within minutes she moved from the marriage hall. Ram was shocked and felt very happy by the things happened. He didn’t even felt this much joy while he tied knot to Meera, but now he felt complete happiness. His eyes were filled with tears and his heart were filled with the memories of his friend now. At last, He understood Sita and her pure affection towards him. He rotated his eyes all over the hall but he couldn’t find her. Meera asked Ram, “What happened? You haven’t told about Sita to me. But she was very nice. I think she was really a good friend of yours!” Ram told, “Nothing! She was my best friend once.” But he said to himself, “No, Sita! Really, you are my best friend forever. Really feeling happy and deserved for having you in my life. Such a beautiful soul you are. You have proved it now!”

Ram is a person who is fond of photography and also a sportsman. He lives his life by enjoying every moment. He respects women and their feelings as such even in this cruel society. A good soul who likes his family a lot. Simply, he was a very good friend of Sita. Yes! Sita was Ram’s Best friend before two years. They both shared everything about them. There were no secrets between them. They used to have a relationship like Tom and Jerry, Angry birds. But they both had too much affection and care, they didn’t expose their affection by words. There was real caring by actions. Their characters were matched. Their friendship was perfect. Months passed… One day, Ram felt like he never wanted to lose his best friend. So, he told her, I never want to lose you in my life. We both are very good friends. And we knew each other a lot. I like your character too”. Sita too felt the same once Ram told everything. They want to marry each other because they never want to lose their best friends. But as we all know our culture won’t accept any individual man or woman to take their decisions on their own even if it is right. So, they both decided that it might not happen one day. So, they just wanted to hold their relationships as friends because they knew that their parents won’t allow their desires and so they never wanted to hurt them. Their matured and altruistic thoughts made them to hold their relationship as friends only. So, they continued their relationship as the same best friends. But one day, Ram became ill and Sita felt like something bad is going to happen. Her instincts and the dreams she had, constantly told her the same. So, she got scared and continuously tried to contact him. But there was no reply from him because he was ill as she thought. At that moment only, Sita came to understand that she had immense affection and care towards him. Her instincts, fear and anxiety made her to react emotionally & this caused many problems in their friendship. Everything is because of her fear about what happened to Ram. But she was strong in their desires because she never wanted to lose her best friend for her relationship. She wanted her best friend back not the relationship. But unfortunately, whenever they both tried to save their friendship, things went wrong and at last their contacts were lost one day. From that day, Sita decided that her friend should be happy with peace and his dignity should be maintained. Yes! She didn’t talk to him, they broke up but this was not a Break up between lovers, this was the BREAK UP BETWEEN BEST FRIENDS. Yes! Their friendship was pure and the affection she had towards him was unconditional. So, she always wanted to know whether he was happy or not, but at the same time she didn’t want to disturb him. Hence, she maintained the silence forever. One day, when Sita was working in her office, she came to know that his friend Ram’s marriage was going to happen in the month of April through a call from her friend who was Ram’s friend too. On hearing this, Sita felt utmost happiness. She wanted to see him happy and she decided that he should not have any guilt or any worries while facing her on any occasions. That was the only reason she went to his marriage. Everything is because her affection, love and care is as pure as Milk. It can’t be tested. Her affection is not just love or commitment where we want the other person to be ours. It is something beyond the boundaries which can’t be understand by ordinary humans. Even her best friend Ram didn’t understand her till when he saw her in his marriage. It is the greatest relationship in her life and for her, he is the greatest friend whom she always wanted to be happy. Their relationship is more than best friends but not expecting anything as return.

Sita came to her house from the marriage and packed all her luggage to vacate the house. She stayed there for one week. Within a week, she collected many memories in that village and a new friend Rupa too. But she decided to leave, because she came there only to attend Ram’s marriage. Now its time to move. She watched the Sparrow’s nest for minutes and said Goodbye to them. But those Sparrows didn’t know that she will not come back. She closed the door of her house and asked Rupa to give the keys to the house owner. At last, She bid a Good Bye to Rupa and to the village with tears in her eyes. But she felt the completeness while leaving from there. With that completeness, she entered into the car which was waiting for her in the bus stop and within seconds, the car moved from that village but a part of Sita’s soul and her memories wander there in the village forever. According to Sita, those memories she had with Ram were enough for her life time.

While travelling, Sita told herself,Ram! Yes, I wanted to marry you, once we both felt like we can be the best pair. But that is only because I never wanted to lose you my best friend & I wanted to be in your life to share all your happiness & sadness together and  to make you happy forever. But once I understood, I am not your happiness, instead I am becoming your problem, I just don’t want to make you feel worry anymore. I want you to live peacefully. And now, it happened. Thank you God! Today am so happy because my bestiee is getting married and his family is also happy.”

“You people may think that the story is not practical.

Yes! It may not be practical for the society we are living now. Because our so-called society always hold many prejudices like religion, culture, caste and yet another main thing is the surroundings. We often won’t think about our decisions and goals, instead we have a lot of perplexities like “What others will think if it happens? What people will say if it happens? What people will speak if it happens?” and the questions goes on…But just think once before you confuse yourself. It was your life. You decide how your life should be. But for taking any decision, you should be deserved. Career is very important for a person to make their decisions by themselves. Either you make friends, love, marry, or being single forever. Everything is in your hands. But mind one thing, your desires should not affect your parents by any means, instead try to make them understand. They are your parents if you can’t make them understand, then how can you make some other (who may be your friend or lover) who cares you to understand.

Sita, a woman who was strong in her desires now got promoted as a Manager and her pure affection and care made her friend to be happy forever too. She wanted to be an empowered woman and she didn’t believe in any relationships which hurt others. She wanted to have a calm and happy life with no compromises or any alternatives. Because if you choose compromises, you will always have to compromise yourself for everything in life. She didn’t think of the society and their criticisms, she just focused in her goals. Because society often curse the people who are living and praise the people who are died. Both the case are useless. Sita proved that she was an empowered woman.”

“But for the society, being single is not a problem but a woman being single is the problem. If you are strong in your desires, just strive for it. Anyone may confuse you or anyone may give free advice to you. But just think once before you think about the society, Are these people cared much about your life more than you? Are they going to live your life? Are they gonna be there forever with you? Are they going to die for your disease? No. Not at all! Everyone in this world is single, sometimes even our shadow left us alone. Then, how people stay forever? So, spread your love, care and affection at the most to anyone you meet but don’t expect anything as return because it is caring not dealing. Be happy with the serenity in life and don’t get over emotion for anything. We are not deserved to fail for emotions, we are deserved to achieve bigger.

Let our life be gratified with peace and desires, but not with compromises or people!”

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